Is your child afraid of the dentist? You’re definitely not the first parent to deal with it.
For some kids, it’s a little nervousness before an appointment. Others start asking questions days ahead of time. And then there are children who want absolutely nothing to do with the dental chair.
Sometimes they cry. Sometimes they refuse to open their mouth. Sometimes getting them through the front door feels like the biggest accomplishment of the day.
At Shorewood Family Dental Care, we’ve seen plenty of nervous young patients over the years. One of them was Wrenna.
She was once terrified of going to the dentist. She didn’t even like brushing her teeth. That changed.
Watch Wrenna’s story below to hear, in her own words, how she went from being scared of the dentist to becoming one of our best patients.
Why Is My Child Afraid of the Dentist?
There’s rarely one universal reason. A dental office is an unfamiliar place for a child. There are bright lights, unusual sounds, people wearing masks and instruments they’ve probably never seen before.
Then someone asks them to lie back and open their mouth.
When you look at the experience from a child’s perspective, a little hesitation makes sense.
Some children are simply uncomfortable with new situations. Others may have heard a sibling, friend or even an adult talk about a bad dental experience. And sometimes parents don’t know where the fear came from at all. That’s okay.
Figuring out exactly why your child is nervous can help, but you don’t need to solve the mystery before bringing them to a dentist for kids.
Your Child’s First Experiences at the Dentist Matter
Children aren’t born knowing that the dentist is something to fear.
Their early experiences can shape how they feel about dental care for years to come.
That’s one reason we don’t want every dental appointment to happen because something already hurts.
Regular dental checkups allow children to become familiar with the dental office when there isn’t an emergency. They get to meet the dental team, see what happens during an exam and gradually learn that taking care of their teeth is simply another part of staying healthy.
A successful appointment for a nervous child doesn’t necessarily mean completing every possible thing in one visit, either.
Sometimes progress is getting into the chair.
Sometimes it’s opening their mouth and letting us count their teeth.
Small wins matter.
How Can I Prepare My Child for a Dental Appointment?
If you already know your child gets nervous about the dentist, what happens before the appointment can make a difference.
Keep the conversation simple.
You might tell your child that the dentist is going to look at their teeth, count them and make sure they’re staying healthy.
You don’t need to give a detailed explanation of everything that could possibly happen.
In fact, less can sometimes be more.
Try Not to Pass Along Your Own Dental Anxiety
This can be difficult, especially if you personally hate going to the dentist. Kids pick up on more than we realize.
If they hear adults talking about painful procedures, needles or terrible dental experiences, they may begin expecting the same thing before they’ve even had an opportunity to form their own opinion.
Even seemingly reassuring phrases such as “Don’t worry, it won’t hurt” can accidentally introduce an idea your child wasn’t thinking about.
Instead, keep your language positive and matter-of-fact. The dentist helps keep your teeth healthy. That’s enough.
Don’t Make the Dentist a Punishment
We’ve all heard some version of:
“If you don’t brush your teeth, the dentist is going to have to…”
You can probably finish the sentence.
Try to avoid turning the dentist into the consequence for poor brushing habits or too much candy.
We want children to see their dental team as people who **help them take care of their teeth**, not people waiting to punish them when something goes wrong.
Let Them Ask Questions
Kids can come up with some pretty interesting questions about the dentist. Let them ask.
If you don’t know the answer, you don’t have to invent one. Tell them they can ask us when they get here.
Giving a child some understanding of what’s happening can make an unfamiliar situation feel a little less intimidating.
What If My Child Cries at the Dentist?
Parents sometimes feel embarrassed when their child cries, refuses to cooperate or becomes upset during an appointment.
Please don’t. They’re kids.
Crying is one way children communicate that they’re overwhelmed, frightened or uncomfortable. It doesn’t mean they’re a “bad patient,” and it doesn’t mean you’ve done something wrong.
The goal is to help your child gradually become more comfortable with dental care, not to expect every young child to behave like a relaxed adult in the dental chair.
Wrenna’s story is a great example of why that patience matters.
She wasn’t always comfortable here. Now she is.
What If My Child Refuses to Open Their Mouth?
This can be frustrating for parents because you know the dentist needs to actually see the teeth.
But forcing the situation can sometimes make fear worse.
Depending on the child’s age, level of anxiety and what dental care is needed, we may need to slow things down and work toward cooperation.
That could mean explaining what we’re doing in child-friendly language, showing them something before using it or simply giving them a little time to get comfortable.
Every child is different.
Some warm up almost immediately. Others need more patience.
Regular Dental Visits Can Make the Dentist Feel Normal
One of the best ways to make dental care less intimidating is to make it familiar.
When children visit regularly for exams and cleanings, the dental office stops being this mysterious place they only see when something hurts.
They begin recognizing faces.
They know where they’re going.
They remember what the chair looks like and what happens when we check their teeth.
More importantly, preventive dental visits give us an opportunity to identify problems before they become painful dental emergencies.
A small cavity that doesn’t hurt is a very different experience for a child than arriving with a severe toothache.
Good Dental Habits Start at Home, Too
Wrenna’s story wasn’t only about becoming comfortable at the dentist.
She also went from hating brushing her teeth to making oral hygiene a much bigger part of her life. That’s exactly what we want.
Children eventually need to understand that taking care of their teeth isn’t something that only happens twice a year at the dentist.
It happens every morning and every night. Depending on your child’s age and coordination, they may still need help or supervision while brushing. Making brushing part of the normal daily routine can help establish habits they’ll carry with them as they get older.
And yes, some nights they’ll complain about it. That’s normal too.
What If My Child Has a Cavity and Is Already Scared?
This is where parents can become particularly worried.
It’s one thing to bring a nervous child in for a routine cleaning. It’s another when you know they may actually need dental treatment.
Start by telling us about their anxiety.
Knowing that your child is frightened helps us understand what we’re dealing with before treatment begins. We can talk with you about what’s needed, what your child may experience and the options available for their particular situation.
Avoid promising your child that the dentist “isn’t going to do anything.” If treatment does turn out to be necessary, that can unintentionally make the experience harder.
Instead, let us determine what’s going on first.
Then we can make a plan.
When Should a Child See the Dentist?
Don’t wait for your child to complain about a toothache before making dental visits part of their routine.
Regular examinations allow us to monitor how the teeth are developing, look for cavities, evaluate the gums and reinforce good oral hygiene habits.
They also give your child something that’s particularly valuable if they’re already nervous: practice.
Each positive experience makes the dental office a little more familiar.
Looking for a Kids Dentist Near Joliet?
If your child is afraid of the dentist, avoiding dental care usually doesn’t make the fear, or potential dental problems, go away.
A better goal is to help your child build confidence little by little.
That’s what happened with Wrenna.
She came to us frightened of the dentist and resistant to brushing her teeth. With time, education and positive experiences, her entire attitude toward taking care of her smile changed. Her story is exactly why we love watching young patients become more comfortable in the dental chair.
At Shorewood Family Dental Care, our Shorewood dental team provides preventive and restorative dental care for children from Shorewood, Joliet and surrounding communities.
Your child doesn’t have to walk through our doors loving the dentist. We’ll work on that part together.
Call Shorewood Family Dental Care at 815-725-5991 or use our online form to request an appointment.
